Trying Transitions

Change is hard!  Whether road construction takes you another route or you've ordered regular and received decaf; dealing with change is frustrating. As adults, we can rationalize and adapt to change but for children who have not yet developed these coping mechanisms, change can cause them to struggle and to act out in socially unacceptable ways.  Tantrums, physical aggression, screaming and noncompliance are just a few challenging behaviors that young children display when they are asked to change; or transition, from one activity to another.  Moving from home to school, from bathtime to bedtime and from the park to home are all examples of transitions that children face in their daily lives. 

As educators of young children, we think about transitions and their effects on the children in our classrooms.  There are many strategies that we use to support children during transitions that can be implemented universally.  These tried and true strategies will help you support your child throughout the day as well:

1.  First and foremost, know your child. Tired and/or hungry children have an especially hard time with transitions. Read their cues and set them up to be successful.

2.  Have realistic and developmentally appropriate expectations for your child. You wouldn't expect your toddler to pick up a book and start reading, so don't expect a toddler to know how to deal with change without practicing and developing the social emotional  skills first. You can set your child up to transition positively by teaching them the skills needed to be successful. Putting on their socks and shoes, hoping into a carseat and washing  hands are all examples of independent skills that encourage children to transition from one activity to another smoothly.

3.  Give your child the language necessary to communicate their feelings. When your child begins to look upset when it is time to transition from the park to home, label the emotion that they are feeling. "You look upset that it is time to go home. We have to start dinner, but we can come back another day."  In this example you have labeled the big feeling that your child is experiencing while  telling your child that you understand the reason behind the emotion.

4.  Rely on when/then phrases to communicate your expectation while letting your child know what comes next. When you go down the slide three more times then we are going home.  This when-then strategy respectfully sets limits and prepares your child for the transition that is about to take place.

5.  Ask a teacher!  Partnering will help you to individualize your transition strategies to support your child's developing skills. Messages that are conveyed consistently support children in understanding and making connections.  Inquire about what works in the classroom. Using the same strategies  help to make the learning connections between home and school. Collaboration benefits everyone involved; particularly children as they navigate through daily transitions.

For  strategies that address specific transitions, please visit the following links from the Backpack Connection Series from ChallengingBehavior.org  :

How to Help Your Child Have a Successful Morning

https://challengingbehavior.cbcs.usf.edu/docs/backpack/BackpackConnection_routines_morning.pdf

How to Help Your Child Have a Successful Bedtime

https://challengingbehavior.cbcs.usf.edu/docs/backpack/BackpackConnection_routines_bedtime.pdf

How to Help Your Child Transition Smoothly Between Places and Activities

https://challengingbehavior.cbcs.usf.edu/docs/backpack/BackpackConnection_routines_transitions.pdf

Making the Most of Your Parent-Teacher Conference

Parent-teacher conferences are coming up. The title of this meeting puts the parent first because the parent is the child's first and most important teacher.  This time to sit down and discuss your child's development is also an opportunity to begin building a partnership. This partnership will positively influence your child's growth by connecting learning between school and home. It will support the consistency that encourages meeting goals that have been collaboratively decided upon.

As you prepare for your parent teacher conference, there are some tips to make the most of your time together:

1.  Make a list of questions and concerns.  Prioritize the list to ensure that you have time to listen to your teachers thoughts.

2.  Have examples of how your child plays and learns at home.

3.  Tell your teacher about your family. Sharing special characteristics and circumstances will provide your teacher with opportunities to make learning meaningful for your child.

4.  Share changes that may impact your child.  Moving further away from school means your child will have to wake up earlier to get to school on time.  This information will provide a context for your child's behaviors and allow for your teacher to put proactive plans in place to support your child during this transition.

5.  Ask questions!  Learn about the intentional activities that are planned to encourage growth and about the activities that you can implement at home to extend that learning.

Conferences are formal meetings but they aren't the only opportunity to discuss your concerns or to ask questions.  There are many ways to communicate with your child's teacher throughout the school year.  Schedule a time to meet, email your teacher or schedule a time to talk via telephone.  Partnerships between parents and teachers positively correlate to children learning and growing.